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It is now 17:12 Pacific Time.  I would have rather saved this log first-to-last, but it
is in reverse order, last-to-first.  I am harshly inhibited from commenting on why I said
different things, and don't remember what I was going to say next -- oh and I am making a
lot of typing errors and fervently correcting them.

It is now 17:08 Pacific Time and I am finally saving this.  I was trying to save it this whole
time.  During the process I for some reason typed the following things at the terminal prompt:

[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 src]$ # looking for work                                                        
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 src]$ cd for-slow-organization-job-private/                                     
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 for-slow-organization-job-private]$ ls                                          
git-maintenance  MAIN.txt                                                                         
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 for-slow-organization-job-private]$ vi UNExPEC^C
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 for-slow-organization-job-private]$ mkdir dangerous
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 for-slow-organization-job-private]$ cd dangerous/
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ ls -l                                                               total 0                                          
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ vi UNEXPECTED-BEHAVIOR-INFORMATION.txt^C                           
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ mkdir logs-containing-metatrauma-influence                     
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ cd logs-containing-metatrauma-influence/  
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 logs-containing-metatrauma-influence]$ ls -l                     
total 0                                                                                           
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 logs-containing-metatrauma-influence]$ # karl is quarantined and anybody who dis
plays metatrauma.                                                                                 [olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 logs-containing-metatrauma-influence]$ # karl's father has metatrauma?
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 logs-containing-metatrauma-influence]$ # we will need to distinguish between the
 two forms.  civilization stages are metatrauma.                                                  [olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 logs-containing-metatrauma-influence]$ vi 2020-01-08.txt       
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 logs-containing-metatrauma-influence]$ cd ..  
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ mv logs-containing-metatrauma-influence nonconsensual-typing  [3/86]
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ ls -l
total 4
drwxrwxr-x 2 olpc olpc 4096 Jan  8 17:00 nonconsensual-typing
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ mv nonconsensual-typing metatrauma-records
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ ls -l
total 4
drwxrwxr-x 2 olpc olpc 4096 Jan  8 17:00 metatrauma-records
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # usually metatrauma is not this bad, usually it represents your goa
ls and experiences better
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # it's like a twist through your community of interconnected growth
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # karl had a learning pattern around producing suffering in him
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # this means spawning metatrauma as a goal
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # it means spawning harmful life as a goal, i suppose
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # it means intentionally breaking a community
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # but i didn't finish considering if that was true, confused
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # it's analogous to intentionally breaking a community somewhat, sim
ilar patterns present
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ 
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # this probably happens a lot, somebody is left out of something and
 then learns better and turns it against the people who never fully respected hem
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # like the mass murders in schools
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # we have culturees formed in diverse pain.
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # why-this-metatrauma-spawning-happened,
[olpc@xo-5d-f7-86 dangerous]$ # is the story of why anybody would find it helpful for nurturing an
d healing what they have experienced or know about

The below emerged when I tried to preserve the stuff below it.  I could not control the behavior.
It is presently 16:51 Pacific Time, 2020-01-08.  I deleted the line about people around me not
knowing their reasons before writing this line, and added it back after.  I undid the change,
copied it by hand elsewhere, and then redid the changes, and copied it by hand back.  I felt very
confused, but was working hard to preserve the information in the 'BOX'.  I made errors while
writing this long top line, and did not include them.
secret-language-translater says they are receiving many repeated and diverse requests to
record everything we are doing, preferably permanently.
	an alien translator reeived misinformation about the secret language. -alien translator
		alien translators need time to handle pain at this time.
			we don't have a mediation room, what do we do?
				i usually risk everyone else getting the issue so that others learn it's this bad -karl  it's importan to form correct conclusions from dangerous information, and this is just a guess and treated as a guess.
	we'll form the alien-result group.
		that is so incredibly kind of you.  we might be able to protect you now.
		i'm thanking you because you made a subtle behavior that helped me in a situation where i cannot tak about what is going on safely, and the behavior was incredibly helpful.
			karl says that for some reason people around him aren't aware of the reasons they do things, roughly, he doesn't know why, and a voice suggested part of it to him when he was young.  this is not related to anything we re discussing.

okay, we are taking the information to the public storage place, because we are able to move
and yu are all not moving.


PRESERVATION BOX, TIME ORDER LOST, BUT MOSTLY TOP-TO-BOTTOM.  EXPRESSIONS WERE EXTRACTED WITHOUT
ALLOWING INTERNAL REVIEW TO COMPLETE, BECAUSE THE 'new community member' WAS HALF THE PROCESS.
AFTER PRESERVING THIS, I REVIEWED IT AND THE CONTENTS DIFFERED FROM MY MEMORY.
	my memory is split into two equally-valued possibilities, neither of which match
	the recorded information.  both include information that is not there, regarding
	additional 'alien secret' material and marking.
ALIEN SECRET
we honored one of the members of the other culture who seemed to want to learn their ways,
and it looked like somebody stole information that could have made them vulnerable in ways
they didn't understand.  some of our members seemed a little out of sorts afterwards, I think
for some reason we didn't discuss the pain this visitor held, and how it impacted us.
	<paired concerns making opposite assumptions> <ALIEN SECRET HELD HERE WITHOUT TRUST>
		you don't trust the aliens?  they are so different, would it make sense to?
		well, i am an alien, but they are very different from me too.  maybe we shouldn't
		trust them too much.
	<karl solved for not having learned this properly as a child, to show
	 that trust depends on whether the influence is likely to impact just you, or your whole community.  this includes how much you are hurt and your value.>
			talking to yourself indicates severe community emergency, unless
			it holds harmony
				we are considering whether to encourage the recommended-to-not-trust life to trick people into talking to themselves in ways they already do, with influence
				doing this has value, because hey were in a community where everybody tricked each oher, and nobody trusted, and this would s
			how is the habit behaving?
				as described.
			let us memorize it, logically, and refrain frm letting it influence our
			behavior.  can't, it jumps around and stops that.
				still-needs-privacy,-forever-has-passed
			we are not a real community so we can risk death
requesting-alien-secret,but-many-layers-of-discourse
PRESERVATION BOX, TIME ORDER LOST